Creating a Legacy

I just read about how women who stay home with their kids have significantly higher cortisol and stress levels. As one of these women, I am not doubting that. It can be mentally and emotionally extremely demanding.

However, I refuse to be influenced by this toxic, wallowing in self-pity mode. Our thoughts create our reality.

If we are constantly thinking about how stressful our lives are, we are going to be stressed. If we are continually focused on how overwhelmed we are, we’re going to be overwhelmed.

A different reality begins with changing the thought process.

Scenario: My children are crying to be held, constantly talking and demanding my attention, and constantly wanting something snacks, drinks,entertainment etc. When I finish cleaning up one mess, we are onto the next. I don’t have a minute to think my own thoughts let alone brush my hair and look nice.

This is common stay at home mom life, and it can be overwhelming.

A simple reframe can change everything.

Reframe: Let’s get out side! Thank you Jesus for this beautiful day, the calming sound of chirping birds, the healing vibrations of the ground beneath my feet. Thank you for the blessings of my children. Thank you that they are happy, vibrant, and healthy. Thank you for the messes because this is evidence of their childhood. Someday they will be grown and my house will be spotless, and I’ll long for this very moment. Thank you that my children have never gone with out and have full bellies.

In the same moment, I can choose to be overwhelmed, or I can choose to be happy and thankful.

I’m not saying it’s always easy, but I am saying that gratitude, happiness, and joy are choices we make.

Focusing on studies about overwhelmed moms and the load stay at home moms carry is not helpful.

This got me thinking about the story of Lot and his wife in Genesis 19 (which I reread, and is, wow, quite the story to unpack.) Anyway, the part I was thinking about was how they were told run from their old life and not look back.

Lot’s wife looked back, and she turned into a pillar of salt. She became useless to her family and useless to future generations.

When we become mothers, we are called to be present in the life we are currently in. If we look back at how life used to be, look at all the things we used to be able to do, look at all the free time we used to have, we cripple ourselves. We take ourselves out of the present moment.

This is dangerous to our motherhood and the legacy we leave behind in our children. We become resentful. Of who? The people we begged God to give us!?

We mothers need to keep our heads in the game. Renewing our minds in thanksgiving for our answered prayers. When we are thankful, we are happy. When we are happy and focused on the present, we can give our children the joyful, fun, childhoods they deserve.

In the present, we can appreciate how freakin cool they are. Suddenly, all the talking isn’t just noise, it’s a window into the soul of the human you created. It’s an opportunity and a blessing. The messes are evidence of a happy childhood. Being able to feed our children is evidence of their healthy bodies.

What BLESSINGS!

I refuse to allow this negative talk that seems so commonplace among my generation of mothers to permeate my motherhood further.

I am blessed and walking in God’s plan and design for me and my life. I am simultaneously shaping the future of the generations to come after me. My motherhood and influence will long out last my memory.

No more looking back.

The present is a gift.

These are, “the good old days.”