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What is Your Perspective?

Updated: May 12, 2023

Lately, I’ve noticed a lot of attention on the struggles of parenthood and marriage. I think that’s great. I love the openness and the honesty. I just feel like a piece is missing in what is being expressed.

People are often either pretending their lives are perfect which is lame and un-relatable or focusing almost exclusively on the negatives which is just half the story.

Yes, we are overwhelmed a lot. Yes, being a present parent is hard work. Yes, there are moments in marriage and family life where things feel hopeless and dark.

In the same breath, there is so much to be thankful for. Keeping things in perspective is so important for feeling joyful.

It’s easy to get caught up focusing on what we don’t have and feeling overwhelmed and miserable. My allergies have been kicking my butt. Eli has been staying up talking a mile a minute wayyyy past his bedtime and ours every single night for the last 2 weeks, and coming into our bed to cuddle after maybe an hour of sleeping in his own bed which never makes for a good night sleep.

Erik and I have had no time to even have an adult conversation with out being interrupted every two seconds with something like, “Mama, Mama, MAMA!!….. lawn mower Rooooooooom,” or his latest thing, needing to stop him from jumping off a chair or table as he pretends to be Humpty Dumpty 😂😭🤦🏼‍♀️. Sweet baby Jesus help me!

We’ve also reached a whole new level of him testing out his independence, vocal chords, and strong will.

Of course, all of this is completely normal and healthy for a two year old child to do. The problem is me. 🙋🏼‍♀️I have been struggling a bit to adjust my parenting style and increase my patience and energy level to affectively keep this child alive and guide him towards healthy and positive choices and living.

I have been grumpy and overwhelmed with this new phase. I’ve been exhausted. I don’t feel great. I miss talking to Erik. Last week, I had been acting like Madame Blueberry feeling sorry for myself about what I don’t have going right.

Every morning, my sweet husband wakes up and makes our family breakfast. Yesterday morning when I came down to a smiling family and a plate full of delicious gluten free pancakes, God spoke to my heart. Things aren’t perfect, and we should feel that through and talk about it, but  at the same time, “a thankful heart is a happy heart.” Yes, I’m totally quoting Veggietales over here.

I have everything I prayed so hard for years and years for. I have a beautiful, healthy, funny, sweet, smart, communicative son who thinks the sun rises and sets around me. What a blessing!

I have a dedicated, honest, loving, thoughtful, handsome, talented, and self reflective husband who works extremely hard, so I can be home pouring myself into our son.

A friend of mine often hash tags, “love your family change the world.” There are so many levels of truth to that. Her posts just loving on her little family encourage me. My brother and sister in law also recently had posts appreciating each other that reminded me to do the same.

I LOVE seeing people loving on their spouses and appreciating them. I LOVE seeing people soaking in precious moments with their little humans. It literally warms my heart.

Let’s love and accept our beautifully imperfect lives so much that it catches on and inspires others to find the joy and beauty in their own lives.

There is so much power in patiently observing and sitting with unpleasant feelings and emotions that stir up in us. It makes it so we can grow, expand our emotional capabilities, and then come to recognize the incredible gifts we have in our lives.

Perspective is everything. Just a little shift in thinking can change the narrative in our heads. When I remember where I was 4 years ago and how badly my heart desired to have what I have now, suddenly, my challenging couple of weeks feels more like a gift than a burden.

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